Microsoft has released a brood of brand new TV ads in preparation for Kinect’s release, and they are about as cloying, desperate, arrogant and pathetic as you might imagine. In fact, they might be the most embarrassing commercials this industry has seen in years.
There are three of them, advertising Kinectimals, Joy Ride and Kinect Sports, although you’ll be forgiven for not knowing which advert is which, due to the fact that barely any gameplay footage is shown. This is all part of Microsoft’s MO — don’t focus on any of the games, because if we look at the software too closely, we might catch on that it’s all bullshit.
Some people like to pretend that it’s the guts and sexism that brings down this industry, but it’s stuff like this that truly makes me feel ashamed. If I had to show my mother these ads or Rumble Roses, I’d pick the half-naked girl wrestling over these mawkish, pandering, intellectually insulting nonsense every time.
Still, Microsoft’s doing a great job of making PlayStation Move look even more tempting!
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I honestly hadn’t heard of lawn darts until a few years ago, when it was introduced to me as “lawn jarts.” Yes, “jarts,” with a “J.” I don’t even think that’s a word.
In any case, there’s a lawn darts game out for WiiWare this week and it supports up to 16 players. That’s either a lot of Wii Remotes lying around your living room, or a hell of a lot of passing around of the controllers.
DSiWare
- ZENONIA (Gameevil USA, 1 player, 800 DSi Points)
- Fizz (DK-GAMES, 1 player, 200 DSi Points)
WiiWare
No seriously… 16 players? I don’t even think I could convince 16 people that we should play a videogame version of lawn darts. Do you think you’d have better luck?
Looks like the combatants in 3DS fighter Dead or Alive Dimensions will be getting a makeover, with new costumes revealed for veteran fighers Ayane and Kasumi. If your idea of a good time is fourteen-year-old girls in hotpants, then these renders are for you!
These new threads are already upsetting fans, with Ayane’s costume in particular causing distress among her creepy admirers. Considering most of these characters have always looked at least faintly ridiculous, I don’t see what the big problem is, but maybe some of you long-term fans can illuminate me.
What do you think? Looking sharp, or do we need to call in the fashion police?
New TECMO Websites & New Costumes [deadoralivegame.net]
Last Friday, a retail listing for FlingSmash made mention of a new peripheral for the Wii, the Wii Remote Plus. Despite the listing being pulled and Nintendo scrunching up its mouth to refuse comment, the publisher has decided to now come clean and admit that the Wii Remote Plus is a real thing.
The Wii Remote Plus is exactly what it sounds like — a Wiimote with the Motion Plus accessory built in. I’m surprised it actually took this long to be made, but there you are. Looks like it’ll come packed with FlingSmash, and will look all sexy and black.
Nintendo has declined to give any more details at the moment, simply saying that it “is real.” If it could at least give us more games that justify the Motion Plus’ existence, that would be nice!
Wayforward has been busting at the seams with information on Shantae: Risky’s Revenge in the last week. The latest bit of data coming from the Shantae fan community e-mailer is that folks who have purchased Mighty Flip Champs will be receiving some sort of bonus item in Risky’s Revenge.
Interestingly, it seems that there will be some variety in what players will receive. The e-mail states that the reward “depends on how mighty of a champ you truly are,” so performance seems to matter in this regard. No matter what you’ve accomplished, you’ll still get at least something out of the pairing.
In case you’ve missed the news, Shantae: Risky’s Revenge arrives on DSiWare on October 4th and will run you 1200 Nintendo Points.
The Just Add Water development blog has updated with a look at how much prettier (or uglier, depending on your standards for beauty) Stranger is going to be looking in the upcoming re-release of Oddworld: Stranger’s Wrath on PS3. As you can see from the above image, Stranger now has 20,000 polygons making up his imposing form, an increase of more than six times what he was rocking in the original Xbox release.
Stranger’s Wrath is the only Oddworld game I haven’t played and all of the love I see it getting has really made me regret that decision. It seemed so reasonable back in 2002 to say that I was never going to buy another Oddworld game after what happened to Munch’s Oddysee. I may have been hasty, but at least I’ll be getting an opportunity to set right what once went wrong.
Stranger PS3 Update [Just Add Water via Game Informer]
The Bild, Europe’s best-selling tabloid newspaper, is reporting that they know the release date for Nintendo’s 3DS handheld system. According to their edition published Sunday, the 3DS will launch in Japan on November 11th, 2010. The paper goes on to suggest the device will “probably” appear in Europe sometime in the first quarter of 2011.
Nintendo is expected to make their formal announcement regarding the 3DS release later this week, so we’ll know sooner rather than later whether Bild really has the goods here. No information on a North American release was printed, but it’s probably safe to assume that it would be arriving there around the same time as the European release (assuming, of course, that the paper has that bit right).
Bild has also listed a price: €200. That’s about $270 in US currency, which is quite a jump from where Nintendo has traditionally priced their handhelds at launch. Time to start scraping together your pennies, folks.
Rumor: Popular German newspaper shares 3DS launch details for Japan/Europe [Nintendo Everything]
(In honor of the upcoming Rally to Restore Sanity/March to Keep Fear Alive I shall deliver all the news this weekend twice: First the sane way, and then the fear way. It’s the weekend, I get to do stuff like this (I hope… please don’t fire me).
Sane: Jamie “Kalapusa” Margary is pretty much the most awesome person I have never met. Don’t believe me? Go here, here and here and then watch the video above.
Margary is the guy who makes incredibly realistic statues of videogame characters, items and enemies. Latest on the list is Pac-Man, or as Margary dubs him Pakku Rotundus. He sent over the video for us to check out with only the simple words that it was the depiction of a realistic Pac-Man in its final days. You can check out more images on his Deviant Art page.
Is anyone else a little perturbed by what appears to be an anus on the back of the Pakku Rotundus?
Fear: Look at that thing. As far as threats to our livelihood go Pakku Rotundus is right up there with bears.
(In honor of the upcoming Rally to Restore Sanity/March to Keep Fear Alive I shall deliver all the news this weekend twice: First the sane way, and then the fear way. It’s the weekend, I get to do stuff like this (I hope… please don’t fire me).
Sane: Man, Aardman Animation is all about the videogames. Not only has Wallace & Gromit been brought into gaming, but they did those awesome Flipnote Studio things for Nintendo. What’s next for the company in the world of gaming? They’re making a live-action/CGI TV show for the Rabbids! The information was found on a job listing and this is easily a match made in heaven, considering Aardman has already dealt with trouble making rabbits in the Wallace & Gromit movie.
Aardman actually did the design for the site for the next Rabbid’s game, Raving Rabbids Travel in Time, where you can play around with the Rabbids’ time a machine a bit. One would thus assume that they worked on the trailer for the game (above), which is featured heavily on the site. Maybe that gives us an idea of what the show will look like, just with more actual things in it and probably a central character for the Rabbids to torment. However, it is a little strange that Ubisoft wouldn’t have pushed the connection more if the trailer is done by Aardman.
Fear: The first problem here is that the Rabbids don’t speak proper English, they just make weird noises. This will teach our children to talk like babies and not learn real words. In the trailer the Rabbid is seen using a lighter, which is clearly promoting smoking. It is also incredibly historically inaccurate, and we all know that programming for children must be educational and can’t just be fun. Also, I think one of the Rabbids looks a little purple in one shot and that makes him gay. We can’t have that in a kid’s television show.
Aardman Making Live Action/CG Raving Rabbids Show [Bleeding Cool, via GoNintendo]
Destructoid LIVE: The whole damn show
Community blogs of 09/25 & 09/26